sometimes I wondering why people can’t understand my mental condition. why they bring me closer and closer to darkness. sometimes they put me on the test, like yesterday with a nurse of night shift……

yesterday I make a call to helpline, because I feel drained and burned out, then she came and we start arguing with one another. now I feel bad and thinking about the ward or make some mistake that shows that I need human touch and I need respect no matter what really happens

tomorrow I need to talk with someone from an authority, or maybe my social worker because now my life is over the rooftop and I think that I can’t survive till tomorrow

yesterday was crash again, and I don’t know how and what I should do next…..

I feel like my emotions and psyche burn again, after strokes a couple of weeks ago I need to change my surroundings or somehow change my attitude toward people and situation that I’m right now