now or never

I started analyzing my health deteriorations and realized that I was hurt by being with other, four or three people. you see, I was never part of a gang, and I lived a life of solitude and alone.
realistically, I needed to find or discover ways to be one among people. I needed that help after the first months of winter quarantine, but what I needed was not available.

I’m looking forward to tomorrow and then the issue of my return to the “cave” will be resolved, I don’t know what that solution will be, but I hope for the best.

I know I need fasting from technology and other things that keep me from living quietly but I can’t. I can’t back down when I have commitments and responsibilities (from which to rest). and I think I will rest being alone