feeling insecure

I want it all over, my non-security leads me to blackness and violence against myself and others.

I need a space where I felt safe and welcome as my world loses grip and meaning. I understand that I am sick and sometimes I have to reject people who are dear to me and myself.

the last few weeks have been an amen hell I’ve been researching to overcome alone, but I don’t remember almost anything and that’s the hardest thing.

my feeling of insecurity leads me to blackness but well that I got away without the hospital and now I feel good enough ….. just or for a long time ….